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Because society places a value on masculinity gay men aspire to it. If you go to a gay club and the doorman says 'You do realise this is a gay club don't you lads?' you get all excited because you think 'Wow he thought I was straight!'

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It has always seemed strange to me... the things we admire in men kindness and generosity openness honesty understanding and feeling are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest sharpness greed acquisitiveness meanness egotism and self-interest are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first they love the produce of the second.