A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then there's my personal favorite the male ego.

Nobody had ever told me junk food was bad for me. Four years of medical school and four years of internship and residency and I never thought anything was wrong with eating sweet rolls and doughnuts and potatoes and bread and sweets.

My grandma's the most careful safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!