When I am made fun of in the press I just remember those days when I'd come home to find that the water had been turned off because my mother couldn't afford the bill. Suddenly everything feels easier.

Everywhere you hang your hat is home. Home is the bright cave under the hat.

I have a life that I enjoy I try and value the things that I think are worth valuing and everything else is icing. You know it is a kick to go down the red carpet in that dress and then you go back home.

I remind everyone: Whether you school them at home or send them to school you as a parent have the responsibility to make sure they learn and behave. Teachers and principals may help but parents are the ones who must accept responsibility.

Many working mothers feel guilty about not being at home. And when they are there they wish it could be perfect. This pressure to make every minute happy puts working parents in a bind when it comes to setting limits and modifying behavior.

Pride avarice and envy are in every home.

Spare a thought for the poor introverts among us. In a world of party animals and glad-handers they're the ones who stand by the punch bowl. In a world of mixers and pub crawls they prefer to stay home with a book. Everywhere around them cell phones ring and e-mails chime and they just want a little quiet.

When I was doing 'Scarface ' I remember being in love at that time. One of the few times in my life. And I was so glad it was at that time. I would come home and she would tell me about her life that day and all her problems and I remember saying to her look you really got me through this picture because I would shed everything when I came home.

We used to go to the pictures every Saturday night but we had to leave a little bit early and get home and watch Match of the Day - and my wife still complains she missed the last five minutes of every film we saw.

The best thing that ever happened to me is that nothing happened in writing. I ended up working for engineering companies and that's where I found my material in the everyday struggle between capitalism and grace. Being broke and tired you don't come home your best self.

I would drive home and see people wearing my No. 34 jersey and wonder why because I didn't feel worthy of that. And all the time I just knew people were staring at me talking about me everywhere I went.

The show doesn't drive home a lesson but it can open up people's minds enough for them to see how stupid every kind of prejudice can be.

A good wife is someone who thinks she has done everything right: raising the kids being there for the husband being home trying to do it all.

Everybody at home speaks mandarin except me.

But as far as Twitter I'll be in a restaurant and I'll get home and somebody tweeted and they talked about what I ordered and what I was wearing. In some cases that could be dangerous because you don't want everybody to know where you are every second of every day.

In Afghanistan there is a plan to build democracy hundreds of thousands of troops are protecting it. There is a plan to rebuild and reconstruct there. But many thousands of Americans die from violence and poverty every year and we don't have a plan for reconstruction at home.

So we come out to Los Angeles. And we met with every network. We met with show runners directors writers everything. And what we had an idea for they didn't like. And what they had an idea for we didn't like. So we went home.

The first presentation of my show was given in May 1883 at Omaha which I had then chosen as my home. From there we made our first summer tour visiting practically every important city in the country.

Women are the victims of this patriarchal culture but they are also its carriers. Let us keep in mind that every oppressive man was raised in the confines of his mother's home.

Every song I put on a record could be a single and I just pack my bags for it... and the minute it takes off I'm not gonna be home for a while.

I have become a queer mixture of the East and the West out of place everywhere at home nowhere.

Every day is a journey and the journey itself is home.

Whatever feminists may say about their only advocating choices everyone knows the truth: Feminism regards work outside the home as more elevating honorable and personally productive than full-time mothering and making a home.

Stand-up is like a movie every night. You write it direct it produce it the audience votes and you go home. There's nothing more satisfying.